Merry anything to you.

Merry Christmas from Texas~! :)

This year's haul of gifts include:
- Scarf - from Cindy
- "Book" in which my siblings wrote messages to me - from Anthony
- New laptop! - from "parents" aka me

I haven't opened the laptop yet because I've used this one (my old one) for much too long, and it's hard to part ways with it. Plus, I'll have to customize it all over again to have all my bookmarks and programs, etc. Oh, first world problems.

I guess I've been pretty productive ever since I came home. I've finished applying for 5 internships so far, but I still feel like I should apply for more. I'll do that when I get to New York. I got to see family, hug and kiss adorable adorable Anthony, played jetlagged Mah-Jong with Lauren, Jordon, and Claudia, and lunched with Iris for a few hours at Panera Bread.

I have to start properly packing for my trip back to NY, bahhhhhhh.

But I still have things left that I want to do here :(
-59 Diner
-Denny's for chicken fried steak breakfast
-See Callie and Fang
-Lazily watch television in the comfort of my own home

I never wanna leave.

omg, it feels so great to be home.

Milk & cereal for breakfast. ♥ Plus an orange. Oh dairy and fruit, how I've sincerely missed you both.

Yay jetlag. I went to bed at 6:30pm right after dinner and woke up at 4:30am~~

♥ ♥ MY BED ♥ ♥

Also, my new phone: Samsung Galaxy Nexus. Soooo nice omg.

I'm spending today writing cover letters and applying for internships. Then I'll recap the end of my semester in Korea. :'(

Good bye.

I'm crying myself to sleep tonight because I'm spending my last night in Korea in my dorm, instead of hanging out with all my friends whom I'll never see again for one last night, only because I have an exam at 9am tomorrow morning and because this fucking dorm didn't fucking coordinate its schedule with the school and is forcing everyone to move out tomorrow, regardless of if we have exams or not.

So I'm never going to be able to say my proper goodbyes to everyone, never going to be able to tell everyone how much I love them so much and how much I've enjoyed my time with them so so much, and never going to be able to bring our friendships full circle and end on a perfect note.

Everyone, this is why you live every day like it's your last because you never know what strings of fate will fuck you over and force you to take an exam in the impossible hours of the morning on your last day, instead of letting you stay up all night with the best people in the world whom you'll never see again.

9 days.

Only late at night do I have this peculiar tendency to not sleep and want to write something,
but what?

It's because being alone in my room, late at night, only magnifies the fact that I am alone.
That no one's bothering to call me
or talk to me
or invite me out
or

I can't sleep on it.

I'm pretty sure I fucked things up here for myself and I thought it was the right thing to do
And it was definitely the right thing to do or now I would still be bitter.
But I guess I'm used to being chosen
for being the stronger one
but this time
stronger
meant
bitter

openly bitter

and no one likes that.
and no one wants to be with that.
and no one wants to be friends with that.

no one

I'm all alone again.

I guess that's how life is supposed to be.

Good decisions.

I might've had this song on repeat and danced along with it as I showered just now.

I might be listening to Gladys Knight's "Midnight Train to Georgia" right now and soulfully singing along.

I might be marathoning Will & Grace from the very first episode right now instead of going out with everyone tonight, in spite of the fact that we only have 2 weeks left.

길치

The plan yesterday was to go to 압구정 and party at Monkey Beach, which is supposed to be this awesome Thai-style bar, and possibly meet up with super hot James.

Cam and I had dinner at Taco Bell (surprise) beforehand and spent our usual too many hours there. Everyone was ready to leave, but they all wanted to take a taxi there. It was only around 10pm, so Cam and I decided the two of us would just take the subway there and find our own way to Monkey Beach.

WELL, by the time we reached our transfer station at 을지로3가, we had just missed the train to 압구정 and the next one was going to be in 20 minutes, so we were like fuck it and decided to taxi to 압구정역.

First off, it took us a little too damn long to hail down a taxi. Fucking Koreans and being racist against foreigners, they would either not stop for us completely or stop in front of other Koreans instead. The taxi drivers here are such dicks. We finally got one, and he drove pretty dangerously and pretty damn quickly. When we had to pay, I decided to pay with card, but it was declined, so Cam paid in cash. We're both pretty sure we double-paid for that shit.

We found a website that had pretty detailed walking directions from the station to Monkey Beach, so we followed exactly what the first step said: "Walk straight for about 10 minutes until you see Galleria." We sure as hell did not find the Galleria, which is supposed to be this huge ass department store that you couldn't miss, so I had to start asking fucking every person who walked by us. They kept sending us farther and farther away from our starting point. Thank fucking god that I'm currently learning the 교통 lesson in Korean class right now because I would not have been able to ask for directions or interpret what was being said otherwise.

We walked for about an hour or so and still could not find Galleria for some annoying reason. And the Galleria wasn't even our final destination- we still had to find Monkey Beach and meet up with everyone.

We ended up in this weird alleyway, which we totally knew was not the right way, despite what everyone else's directions were leading us to. We cracked a joke about how we were gonna find Monkey Beach before we even reached Galleria.

One minute later, we found Monkey Beach before we reached Galleria.

Irony's such a bitch.

Well, I had totally walked off my dinner by that point and was hungry as hell, so our brilliant minds decided it'd be a great idea to just down some soju and Red Bull to make up for the night. Immediately got drunk.

Monkey Beach wasn't worth going through all that we went through to get there. The buckets of drinks were pretty cool to drink out of, but it was super crowded and no hot guys.

Hugest bummer of the night: hot James didn't even come and probably isn't coming back to Seoul, and Scott told me that James had totally wanted to fuck me. Goddammit.

Cam and I left the place at around 4am and went to Burger King to eat meal #3 of the day. We stayed there til about 6:30am talking about getting laid, and then walked back to SK and went to bed at 7am.

Classy night.

Lesson of the story: Fuck Galleria.

Good ol' days of sitcoms.

I miss watching

Friends
Will & Grace
8 Simple Rules (John Ritter era)
Malcolm in the Middle
Just Shoot Me
Sabrina the Teenage Witch

TGIF on ABC was also kind of my jam.

Attitude.

That's hot.

That reminds me, I get a free manicure from the nail salon downstairs. Traded a free Americano coupon and a 24-pack of toilet paper for it.

But on the topic of attitude.

Being a bitch: I've done it again.

It should be kind of disconcerting to others that this isn't even the first time I've decided to just cut someone completely out of my life, despite the fact that they've been a significant part of it. It's just that when there's bullshit, I am just completely not willing to put up with it, especially when it's been going on for 3 months now, and I just want to be able to enjoy my last month here (3 weeks to be exact! Ouch.) however I want to.

It may seem like a bitch move, but is it really so bad if I'm able to mold my life to my own terms when I can, instead of suffering? If someone is being difficult in your life, and you've tried what you've could to fix the situation and nothing's worked, then I really feel like the best solution is to leave them and move on with your life. You really can't keep dwelling or else you'll get nowhere.

Thanksgiving 2011

Things I Am Thankful For:

1. The experiences I have been lucky to have this year - I got to visit Europe for the first time in my life and got to travel to so many different countries with a great group of people. I've never lived in such a peaceful city as Prague, so it was a very nice experience, but Paris was my favorite. It really brought out the latent artistic, refined side of myself. Now I am living in Seoul, which is a complete 180 degree turn of a cultural and living experience from living in Europe. I've been traveling this whole year and have so many stories to tell from this one year alone.
2. Great friends - I realize that the only person who will always be by my side in life is myself, and that people will come and go, so I am grateful for anyone who has continued to stay by my side to this day, even if they will leave me in the future. Carolyn, Kathryn, Linda, Iris, Lauren, Callie, Jordon, Caleb, Fang, Han, Patrick, Connie, Cameron, and anyone else- you guys are all a part of my friendship pie at the moment, and I am thankful for that.
3. Wonderful family - I'm surrounded by many people with severed families and am grateful that I have a huge loving family, in spite of the occasional riffs that are characteristic of any family. I love my caring parents for supporting me in the experiences I've wanted to have- paying for my NYU tuition, allowing me to study abroad for this whole year, etc. I love my 4 younger siblings- Christina, Cindy, Annie, and Anthony. Even though I don't show them how much my life would be incomplete without them, I really am grateful to have so many littles who look up to me, and I couldn't imagine not growing up in a household filled with loud laughter, screaming, and scuttling feet 24/7.

I feel like I'm thankful for the same things every year, but it shouldn't be a bad thing because it's great that everything I'm thankful for is with me every year.

Happy Thanksgiving 2011, from Seoul, South Korea.